Why it's so hard to learn English

I saw this on the net and thought I'd share. Anyone who has ever coached an elementary school student in their spelling has run into this difficulty, too. Maybe I should back off of my attitude about immigrants (legal or otherwise) learning to communicate in this country in English.

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. At the army base a bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
22. You park in a driveway, yet drive on a parkway

23. NOTE: Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

24. Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
25. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?
26. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?
27. Why is it called "after dark" when it's really "after light"?
28. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?
29. Why do they call it a TV set, when you only get one?
30. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

Halloween 2009

We began our Halloween planning early last spring. You see, Halloween in our family is a "Happening" and not just one of many yearly holidays. It is an "Extravaganza" requiring many hours of careful planning and consideration.

Our considering and mulling began with ideas about our costumes. Maggie, Ellen, and I discussed many options, but our first "working plans" were settled by the beginning of summer when Ellen decided that she would like to be Moses in his Egyptian period. Maggie chimed in with Miriam, Moses' mother in her grief filled moment of placing her sweet babe in with the bulrushes at the mercy of the elements and an all knowing Heavenly Father.

By the time Halloween rolled around, plans had firmed up with Ellen as a vampire princess and Maggie as Pharaoh's wife....or "a" Pharaoh's wife...maybe Cleopatra.

I wish I had taken pictures... but, we had a wonderful seasonal activity with the younger grandchildren. The kids helped me as I took pieces of cut up wienies and we pushed several uncooked spaghetti noodles through each piece of hotdog. When we had a bowlful of them we boiled the whole mess making hotdog pieces with hair which we called "Witchie wienies" Adding spaghetti sauce made "Witchie wienies with blood" which we consumed at a family home evening along with a lovely fresh veggie plate. I think we had brownies for dessert. You had to be there to truly appreciate it. When we got home from Reed's house and reported to our at-home family the boys ( almost in unison) informed me that: "Ma, witches don't have wienies." in droll voices.

See Vicki's blog with a report on Josh's activities.

Clever

Here are some illustrations. Can you tell what their meanings are????

Just a joke

I saw this joke at Sal’s Not So Secret Ramblings. Hoh hoh, this is gooooood!

The Pope and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi were on the same stage in front of a huge crowd.

The Pope said, “Did you know that with just one little wave of MY hand I can make EVERY person in the crowd go crazy with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts, and they will forever speak of this day and rejoice.”

Pelosi seriously doubts this, and says, “One little wave of your hand, and all people will rejoice forever?? Show me”, she said.

..so the Pope slapped her.

Hmmmmmm....

Obama??? Nobel Peace Prize??????

Run Away....!!! Run Away...!!!

The Swenson-Bacon family spent last week with Joshua in isolation because of his "Piggy" flu. There was great apprehension that the geriatric wing of the family would catch it. I guess that is going to be a worry for at least the next few days as Vicki was sent home from school today running a pretty good fever and with her chest aching. She and Chip are on their way to the walk-in clinic now for testing and probably a Rx for Tamiflu and instructions to stay in bed in her room.

She has instructed Matt that he will be the cook for the next little while. I guess Josh will resume his post as the chief trash collector, etc. This is the part of family living that is most challenging.

Meanwhile, Harvey and I are still riding high from this past weekend's conference. We were able to watch most of it from our "wing" of the house and enjoyed most of the talks. Elder Holland's moving talk was my favorite. I will remember it as one of the landmark talks. I also enjoyed seeing a little change in Elder Scott's typical monotonous talk delivery. He almost pounded the pulpit. Was that beads of sweat on his upper lip???

Pray for us.... We would like to think that we do not have to pass this around the family for the entire fall season. Hopefully we can practice healthy hand washing, etc, and escape this.

Good News!

Word came today that the mass on my thyroid looks ok and that I can postpone having the right side of my thyroid removed for several months. That will allow me to go ahead on schedule for my bipass surgery.

I am sooo grateful for all of my family and friends and for their good wishes and prayers. I feel very loved.

Thank you, all.